Pumpkins

We did this last month, too.  We cut out a big construction-paper orange pumpkin.  We used other pieces of construction paper to give the pumpkin different shaped eyes, noses, and mouths.  We used tape so the pieces could easily be removed and replaced and put back on later.  We made happy faces and sad faces.  We taped on different combinations of mouths and eyes and noses to see what it looked like.  She loved it.  She especially loved changing the emotions of the face.  It was interesting for me to notice that when the pumpkin felt certain emotions - like, when it was sad - she wanted to put it in time-out.  It became quite a game for her.  The connections she made between emotions and 'time-out' were interesting to note.  

We also cut out a "p" for pumpkin and reviewed its sound.

Social Roles and Happy Work

I think my daughter is at a stage where she is learning, among other things, two really important aspects of living at 22 months of age: (1) social roles, and (2) how to feel and respond to different things when she is unsure. 

With regard to social roles, I've noticed that, for example, if Daddy cuts open the popsicle the first time she has one, she goes back to him to cut the next one open.  If Grandpa helps her with something, she goes back to him when she needs help with that thing.  And, since Mommy always puts her to sleep at night, Mommy is really needed at bedtime.  So that has me thinking, what are the social roles she is learning about herself?  It has been more tempting than ever since we moved to stash her away with toys, music, and activities to distract her when I need to get things done, but what is that teaching her about her role in the family?  I want her to learn that she has a contributing role in the household and then, later, in the world.  And she wants to contribute.  So I'm working on incorporating her, given her current capacities and the activities she finds the most joy in doing, into a real contributing role for our family.  One example of this is that I'm going to let her clear the table after meals.  It takes longer, but she LOVES doing it.  The other night my husband and I were just chatting away after dinner, and all of a sudden we realized that our daughter was taking my husband's plate off the table.  She took it to the counter, and then came back for more - our little munchkin cleared off the entire table.  And she loves wiping things with wet cloths, and so I need to become more mindful again about letting her wipe down the table after meals.  

As for the second point, I've noticed that she looks to me for how to respond in questionable situations.  Like, she sees something on the ground that looks interesting, but is it okay to touch?  So sometimes she points to it and declares, "Eww!!!!" looking to me for a response.  Or else she picks it up, glancing at me to see what I do.  Or with church, when we moved we had to start going to a new church.  The first Sunday, when we arrived at the strange place, she wasn't sure what she thought of being at a new church.  I tried to nurture the part of her that liked the church, though, and now she is happy to go there.  One thing I do not feel like I have done well is nurture within her a sense of joy in work.  I do not model this well - I don't like housework.  I don't do it cheerfully.  I don't do it grumpily, either, and I try to laugh and sing and be happy as we do it, but toddlers are amazingly perceptive, and I'm sure she's noticed that I'm inconsistent with getting things done, that I avoid the laundry, etc.  My parents did a really great job raising me in a lot ways, but this really wasn't one of them.  I want to do better for my child.  So one of the things I'm going to do is start our "school" time that we do in the mornings with a prayer I found in a little book we have of prayers from around the world:

Thank you, God, for this new day, 

For our work and school and play.

Please be with us all day long

In every story, game, and song.

May all the happy things we do

Make you, our Father, happy, too.

Teaching a Toddler to Share?

Several months ago I was meeting with a mom support group.  One of the moms asked about teaching sharing to her 18 month old.  I said what my husband and I had done with our daughter, which seems to have worked.  But then all the other moms insisted that young children cannot and should not be taught to share.  Sharing is not natural, they said, and toddlers definitely are not programmed to be capable of grasping the concept.  I was startled.  Today I was reviewing the sharing concept with my daughter, and she was really fussy about it.  She hasn't always been like that.  

I had taught her how to share in two parts.  First, we started at home.  She's an only child, and so she doesn't have any sibling competition.  So during music time one evening, my husband and I started taking turns with her playing with the sticks.  We did it to the rhythm of a song she knew.  During one semi-lengthy phrase of music, dad would get to play with them.  During the next phrase, she would.  During the next phrase, I would, and then back around again.  We did it to the music so that she would be able to predict how long she had to wait to get the sticks back.  She protested at first, but then she got the hang of it after a few rotations and became quite the eager sharer.

Second, I worked with her in the presence of other toddlers her age, who care far more than her dad or I who is playing with what.  I started with a 2 and a half year old, whose special doll my daughter wanted to hold.  I prompted the older child to share with this little baby (my daughter), and she unhappily but willingly complied.  I applauded this child's really, really good sharing, saying what a good sharer she is and what a big girl she is.  She was so happy to hear this, that she proceeded to get everything she could off the shelf to share it with my daughter.  Then my daughter, having seen and experienced this other child sharing with her, was happy to share right back.  I've done this in numerous settings now with other kids, and it always works once we get over the initial sharing hump.  

So I really thought this was all well and good until these mothers insisted that children cannot and should not be asked to share.  At first I just disregarded them, but then today when I was practicing taking turns with my daughter as we played with her toy horse, she was going nuts.  "NNNOOOOO!!!" she would squeal when it was my turn.  I pried the toy out of her hands a couple of times, certain she would get the hang of it, but it just made her madder, and I started to feel uneasy about insisting on taking it from her.   And I noticed that she was getting in the habit of handing me the toy for my turn, then not letting go of it and throwing a fit when I reached to take it, but insisting that I reach to take it if I decided not to...  And she's not really consistent with sharing anymore when we're with other kids.  

So I really want to know whether or not to continue to pursue the sharing skill.  I think the music teaching went really well, and maybe we should review it that way more often.  Maybe the problem is that I just assumed, "Okay, now she shares," and didn't review it enough in general.  But I really want to know from other homeschooling moms who are intentionally teaching social skills to their children whether or not sharing is something to work on for a 20 month only child.  

  

Before you buy curriculum...

...check out what your family can use for free at the library.  My county's library system, for example, has the complete set of Hooked on Phonics, along with 528 other phonics resources.  They have almost all of the Signing Time DVD's (which would be $25 each otherwise - we've used 15 of them for FREE).  They have all kinds of science experiment books.  I found a great one for toddlers ages 2-5.  They even have math textbooks!  If you want sometime in particular, even if your local library doesn't have it, the wider county library system, where your card will work, probably will have it or something comparable.  Also, almost all libraries have special play and reading times that are age specific from babies on through adults, and that is great for social development.  The library at the last place where we lived (we've moved) even had special bi-monthly music time followed by a craft time for all aged children.  I didn't like the baby time at the new place where we moved, but a local library only 10 minutes away had a fabulous one, and we went there every Thursday all year.  If you want more socializing time for yourself and your child(ren), you can even make the rounds, going to different libraries on different days of the week -lots of families do this.  Seriously, if you haven't tapped into this resource, don't spend another cent until you've seen what you can get from your tax dollars at the library.